Monday, October 17, 2011


As I passed class 12th, all sorts of confusions started troubling me, what to do and what not to do. It was mainly having an effect on me because my father was not able to come to a conclusion. I was quite on a single track regarding what I wanted to do, and that was to get into the Civil services. But before that I needed to graduate as well, so now a new problem had to be solved, where to do graduation from? Being a school topper in 12th wasn’t of much help to me, the only happiness it gave me was that my name was put up on the school toppers’ list.

After clearing many entrances including LAW, BBA, BBE, and many more, I changed my mind, and finally got into a leading commerce college in Chandigarh to do, and pursue Chartered Accountancy course side by side which was due to a lot of brain wash from my father, who strongly discouraged me from getting into the Civil Services. I was always afraid of the CA profession, and for me; in particular, a lot of hype was always there for this course. This was because every male member from my mother’s side was a CA, and I had grown up listening to their experiences! I was convinced that this course was not for me, and when I would eventually fail, then I'd get the nod to pursue my area of interest, the Civil Services. 

An year went by and it was the time to appear for my first CA exam, (Nowadays known as the CPT), I was totally unprepared and took the exams. After the exams I was sure that I won’t be able to get through, so my father asked me to take classes for it again. Meanwhile, the result was out, and I unexpectedly passed! On a personal front, it was quite an achievement to start with. I was quite overjoyed. I thought that it was a fluke and I won’t pass in the next exams surely. College kept on going and so did my studies for CA. Another year went by and it was time for the second CA exams. After appearing for the exams, I wasn’t quite sure if I would make it this time around also. So, when the result was out, to my utmost surprise I passed again! To be very honest, that really was a big thing for me, and I didn’t know how to react that day, but on the other hand I saw my hopes of getting into the Civil Services being shattered, as my plan was going against me only! Now, I had to focus and concentrate on the CA course, as I had moved into its FINAL lap. Till now, I had achieved this success without even a single hiccup and that too when it was not expected at all.
Advices now started pouring in, that I better not underestimate this course and start planning my studies accordingly. It was quite evident that getting through the CA FINAL examinations was not a joke, and I better be prepared for it. So, after my graduation was over, I went to Delhi for coaching. The time I spent in Delhi wasn’t easy, went through a lot but made some great friends as well. This time, I took things seriously, unlike before. After a year, my coaching was complete and I appeared for my final exams, wasn’t much confident of clearing, like always before, but still had some hope as I had put in a lot of effort. On the day of the result, I was very nervous and so was everyone at home. I had never seen them getting that anxious before. The result was out and I didn’t make it. That day was very tough and I couldn’t digest it that easily. Time had come to open up the books again and get back to studies. I always had a habit of doing things in the nick of time, and this was no different, barely 3 weeks were left for exams, when I actually got serious for studies. This time around I managed to clear 4 exams of a group, missed 1 subject marginally in the other group of 4 subjects, but since this was CA, had to give the remaining 4 exams again due to that 1 subject. Although I had not even studied for that other group even for a single day but since I missed it marginally, it gave me the confidence of clearing it in the next time, if I studied a bit more. I did study a bit more, but not as much as I should have had, banking on the past success. According to me, my exams went on well this time barring 1 subject in which I wasn’t confident enough, but still had a lot of hope that I would become a CA this time for sure. So, everyone in the family began to anticipate and kept waiting eagerly for the result. The result was out, and to my utmost surprise, I didn’t clear, as I had forgotten that one cannot ever be sure of a CA result, which always has a lot of surprises in store for us. This time everyone in the family was really disappointed with the way things had shaped up.

It took me a while to assess what had gone wrong and focus again. When I had almost regrouped my energies and concentration, the Cricket World Cup had started. Being a cricket maniac, I could not control myself and had forgotten all that happened to me. Moreover, Indian team also added to my woes, I watched their every match and they also  kept on winning again and again, until they won the Cup!

After India had won, a little over a month only was left for the exams, but this time, I had made up my mind to work hard, and so I did. Studied a lot till the exams, left no stone unturned. After the exams were over, I had a mixed feeling that it could go either way! I started preparing myself and everyone at home for the worst case scenario. After a month or so, the date of result was announced, but this time I didn’t take any chances and kept it to myself, nobody at home or any relatives had even a hint of it.  I was being asked on a daily basis for the date of result, which I kept on denying having any knowledge of. 

Finally the ‘D’ day had come and I woke up normally thinking that the result would be declared around afternoon, which was the norm from the past, I was reading the newspaper till I got a phone call that the result was out. It was just 9 am and I still wasn’t in my senses when I got the shock. I didn’t know what to do (obviously had to check the result) instantly, it took me a while to control my nerves and without telling anyone I went to check my result. While I was in the process, my mother came and sat beside me discussing the routine matters, she didn’t even had the slightest of hint of what was going on with me that time! When the result page opened up, I could not believe what I saw, I shouted that I had become a CA and hugged my mother, ran away to inform my father and took him also by surprise! Within seconds I discovered what I had achieved and started crying along with my mother and there were tears and only happy tears all around!

More than myself, I was happy to see that look on my parents face, who had this dream to see me as a CA, a feeling which is beyond all words..........

As for me, my heart still lies with the Civil Services.


  1. Though I felt your joy I felt very sad too -- but your dream is still possible, unless they don't allow CAs to appear for Civil Services. As a parent I can tell you with authority that they will be happy for you if you manage to convince them of your resolve and then prove yourself a success in your chosen career. They might be upset for a while but come around sooner than later.

    PS: the songs I heard on your blog today took me back to the time the brats were growing up at home and I had written about it in one of my posts MTV, the brats and me! Thanks :)

  2. Zephyr : Thank you so much for the motivation. I shall now try to work on these, will surely read your MTV post !

  3. Nice... Good one... God Bless u

  4. Replies
    1. Hi you are doing a great job. I was looking for this information. I found it on your page its really amazing.I am sure that these are your own views. I hear exactly what you’re saying and I’m so happy that I came across your blog. You really know what you’re talking about, and you made me feel like I should learn more about this. Thanks for sharing useful information; I’m officially a huge fan of your blog.

  5. i have read this literary piece of you earlier also... still many a times i feel reading it over has that sense of attraction plus the instrumental playing side by side... may be this story of yours i can connect to also to many extent. ... emotions are par excellence with anything that you have conveyed with a lot of zeal.... as far as your civil services are concerned.... no harm in trying and assessing i feel.... and being a CA is a feel in itself.... keep it up.... best wishes.... its long since you wrote something and i am waiting since long.... kuch likhiyega sir... !!!

  6. Win Exciting and Cool Prizes Everyday @, Everyone can win by answering simple questions. Earn points for referring your friends and exchange your points for cool gifts.

  7. Hi there all, here every person is sharing these kinds of
    knowledge, so it's fastidious to read this website, and I used to visit this website daily.

    My site; garcinia cambogia extract